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John Chard
Pan's Pulsing Peril. I expected the worse, where given some of the outright scorn poured on Gabriel Bologna's independently produced TV style movie, has been quite scary in itself! Truth is, is that it is very much same old same old as regards genre tropes, but it at least does it well enough to not make this a complete waste of time. Set-up is via a prologue that establishes something murky and menacing happened back in Turkey 1927. Forward to the present day and a bunch of horny young adults converge on a cabin and find a mysterious board game that might relieve the tensions. Said game is of course a left over from that Turkey curse thing, a game which brings out all the pent up bile and fantasies that were previously lying dormant in this so called bunch of friends. What transpires is hardly surprising, the group turn on each other - and turn each other on as it happens - where Bologna throws all the "cabin in the woods" staples into the pot. Blood does flow, shrieks do feature, as does ink streaming out of the protagonist's eyes. Robert Patrick is under used as the creepy vodka swigging guardian of "his" island, and much of the youthful cast struggle to impact with conviction. Yet as the thongs and boobs cater for the like minded under sexed, and as the gore (refreshingly not over killed by CGI) keeps on a coming, The Black Waters of Echo's Pond still fills out its run-time with honest horror movie intent. Not one to rush out and grasp with bloody hands, but as late night cable time fillers go it passes muster. 6/10